Don’t Wait, Don’t Rush
There’s the adopted child who comes to the parent and asks about his before life; the foster child who is anxious to talk about her feelings. Then, there are those who say nothing and ask nothing.
Trauma-informed parents don’t assume that the boys and girls who are interested in their past or who have a need to talk about it are the ones coming forward. On the contrary, the fact the child isn’t asking may indicate just how great the child needs to connect and feel connected to their source.
Children always need guidance when they seek discovery and understanding of what has happened to them. Parents must carefully plan a time that is safe for their son or daughter; a time completely free of judgment and shame.
Awaken your child by showing them that you are attuned and attentive to him or her. Parents take the initiative to empower your child. Give them permission to ask, to bother you with questions, to express what they are feeling. Don’t demand, just give the invitation.
If you build it, they will come; in her time; in his way.
Educator / Trauma & Recovery / Counselor
Dr. Roderick Logan believes and his life’s work reflects that human suffering is not a fate to be borne, but a challenge to be overcome. He is a certified trauma specialist and works routinely with foster and adoptive parents, grieving families dealing with loss, and caregivers seeking to become trauma informed. He is a trainer for Arizona Trauma Institute, assisting others on the journey to become a certified trauma specialist. He holds a Master’s in Biblical Counseling and a Doctorate in Practical Theology. His trauma certifications CFTP and CCTSF are with TII and IATP.